Dear African Man

“When a father beats a child he does it out of anger,but when a mother beats her child she does it out of love”.

– African Proverb

I just wanted to let you know that
It is okay to cry, to be afraid, to be intimidated
There is nothing wrong with breaking down, when
The walls of the world seem to close on you.

I am sorry, that society has demanded too much of you,
That you should always be the fierce provider
The never changing bread winner
The mighty family protector
But what happens when you don’t meet cultural,
Societal and stereotypical expectations?
What happens when you cannot conceive and multiply?
Does that mean that you are a failure?
Or that you should turn to the bottle?
What happens when you are not masculine enough?

Creds : IG @skr.kidsouth

I have seen it…
When all that pressure builds in you come back to bite down
The walls that have suffocated you.
But tell me…what’s the worth of your fists on a woman?
When your words destroy all in the name of being ‘’strong’’
‘’Mighty’’ and ‘’Untouchable’’?
You too like a woman can instill discipline without
Having to enforce it with your anger
I said it is okay…
To show affection even when it is not due
You didn’t know?
Yes it is possible to be a feminist and still maintain your masculinity.
I am sorry that the African Culture expects too much from you
It tends to forget that you too are human
That you also feel and that the world is also
Unfair to you as to anyone

Creds: IG @kiss.the.king

I beg to differ…
I say societal expectations have no right to shape
The real African man you were designed to become:
Full of love, secure and prone to mistakes just as
Every creature that scratches the surface of the Earth.
You too rock African man.

20 thoughts on “Dear African Man

  1. Good post. Agreed. No man should ever lay his hands on a child or woman. Unfortunately, I saw my dad physically abuse my mother. I did all I could to stop, but was too small. Thankfully, there were others who were able to.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Well said! My father, like far too many other Caribbean men, was verbally and physically abusive to our mother and her five children. In a patriarchal world, much pressure is placed on the male members of our societies, as you express so eloquently in your post. It’s the downside of gender inequality.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I also love your writing style…… I just started as an editor for an online publishing agency. It publishes mainly young and or new African authors. If you’d be interested in reading a few of the books and posting honest reviews, I could email you free copies. It’d really help with the authors’ growth.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Men, of all races. Need mentors and good examples. Hard world for men and women. We need the days of two parent, teaching honor, respect and kindness. My father, a Ojibwa/Mexican was violence, drank and dangerous to himself. Hard life, war and drink made him confused. I agree, the mother is the key. The mother, the teacher of love. Powerful words and amazing photos dear Poet.

    Liked by 1 person

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